


Comfort by Vulcan Lover

by KSForever



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: A sort of TOS & TNG crossover, F/M, In one chapter only there is some het cos Deanna & Picard have a one night stand, In the TNG ep Rascals Will is forced to pretend Jean-Luc is his Dad but that isn't in this fic, It's more of alternating chapters telling two gay love stories, M/M, No Sexual Violence, PTSD for Jean-Luc about being assimilated & resulting counselling conversations afterward
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-30
Updated: 2018-08-21
Packaged: 2019-01-26 13:14:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12558152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KSForever/pseuds/KSForever
Summary: A sort of TOS & TNG crossover ×It's more of alternating chapters telling two gay love stories ×PTSD for Jean-Luc about being assimilated & resulting counselling conversations afterward ×No sexual violence ×Set in an AU where the events in the episode Rascals where Jean-Luc tells the Ferengi that Will is his father do NOT happen here ×





	1. Comfort

**Author's Note:**

> A sort of TOS & TNG crossover ×It's more of alternating chapters telling two gay love stories ×PTSD for Jean-Luc about being assimilated & resulting counselling conversations afterward ×No sexual violence ×Set in an AU where the events in the episode Rascals where Jean-Luc tells the Ferengi that Will is his father do NOT happen here ×

“It’s good that you’re going home tomorrow…” Deanna looked across to Jean-Luc as she sat in his quarters with him.

 

“You think so?” Picard asked.

 

“Yes.” Deanna smiled. She felt him thinking something then…And, watched him seem to shy away, to turn his face. “It’s quite natural…” She assured him.

 

“What is exactly?” Jean-Luc tried to ask neutrally.

 

“To want to assure yourself that there is still some love and warmth out there in this Universe.” Deanna responded.

 

“But how can I do that when I don’t want anyone encroaching on my…space… again.” He had hesitated because he was reluctant to use the word space when he was a starship Captain.

 

“But you want to find some warmth and love precisely because you want to prove to yourself that you won’t be…” she paused, trying to look at him and find the right word.

 

“Raped..?” He replied unattached to the word.“… again… So, ok, it wasn’t a sexual thing…

But it was intimate. You know you were invaded, and I know you were…” Deanna continued.

“That’s what the Borg are all about…” Jean-Luc answered. “That, and perfection.”

 

“And though I know you might think it odd for us to talk about it, sex is an intimate thing, and a thing that can make a person feel safe and loved… So, don’t apologise for what just crossed your mind, Jean-Luc.” Deanna told him. “Especially not you, after what you’re having to live with… Lesser things can drive a person to crave the same kind of assurances.”

“Are we talking about you now, Deanna..?” Picard asked, uncertain.

“If I’m honest, yes.” Deanna replied.

“Is Will the cause or the cure..?” Picard queried tentatively, not entirely comfortable with his own question.

“Again, truthfully, I don’t know… But it would be nice to not be alone.” Deanna admitted.

“Well, I don’t think I’ll be asleep anytime soon… So, as long as are comfortable with sharing my living room, you are welcome to…” Jean-Luc told her.

Deanna got up, and went to sit next to Jean-Luc. “Is this ok?” She asked, as she sat down – Aware that he could still having sense-memory of entrapment. Again, then, she felt the same wave of emotion and impulse from him as earlier. “Thank you.” She looked at him.

“It’s okay… I promise you…”

That night, they didn’t separate when Jean-Luc crawled into bed. Neither of them were sure that they should allow themselves to stay together, but they did. Just in each other’s embrace, until they turned to one another, each regarding the other, and Deanna carefully draped her arm over his hips, her hand gently at his back.

At that moment, Deanna and Jean-Luc kissed, here, in his bed… and, continued to kiss.   
As he came up against her thigh, Jean-Luc was embarrassed, but Deanna stroked his face with her fingers, and smiled. “It’s okay…” And she deepened their kisses, moving even closer to Jean-Luc.

After a while, pausing to look at each other again, Deanna peeled Jean-Luc’s trousers off of him, unfastening them, and lowering them over his hipbones and thighs.

He wriggled out of them from there, and discarded them, and then, let Deanna do the same with his underwear, which he got rid of again. Every step they were taking was very cautious, slow; an amazing release, a shared much needed moment in time somehow. Jean-Luc caressed Deanna’s shoulders, taking down her uniform-jumpsuit over those shoulders, stroking the skin there, and her neck, with a kind brush of the back of his fingers…

And, Deanna disrobed, too.

After that, their love-making continued; hushed; in awe, savouring the strength that grew now between them.

Deanna shifted to lay beneath him, but lovingly, still kept assuring contact, holding Jean-Luc safe, yet refraining from intrusive grip… Her fingertips danced across his skin, breathed softly across his back… Her lips kissed his lips, and with each careful thrust into her, each dip that brought his torso toward hers, her breasts met his chest, and sweetness filtered through to each of them…

Jean-Luc kissed Deanna’s lips with gentle gratitude and kindness… When he moved within her, he made sure she went with him, and he kept eye contact the whole time so that they could share the journey… As he felt her tighten around him, and her arms keep him sheltered, it was all with a touch so light, and yet so touching, that he did not feel afraid… He found his reassurance.

And so did Deanna.

In the morning, Jean-Luc would be visiting his family in France, but, for now, Picard and Troi were here, together.

The End..?  
8.9.06


	2. A New Door Opens

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Generations Movie fix it

Author's Chapter Notes:  
AU Generations movie timeline - Kitk is rescued from the Nexus, and in hospital. Spock will not leave him at all. Kirk is restless to be let out of hospital - Deanna invites KS to hers and Will's wedding.

A New Door Opens

Kirk slowly woke up. He'd been in this Infirmary (hospital) for several days now; he knew that much, but each time he awoke, it was an adjustment.

He believed Picard, and left the Nexus with him, to fight a man named Soran. James T Kirk had very, very, very nearly died, and would have done so, but Picard shoved him out of the way of the weapon blast that Soran aimed squarely at him. The result was, both Kirk and Picard were injured, in varying degrees, but they managed to work together, and a mistake from Soran lead to him bringing about his own death. Anger made him careless, and his weapon backfired on him.

Picard called his ship, the Enterprise (D), which was, to say the least of it, out of commission on another part of the planet, but his First Officer had managed to find a shuttle and a shuttle pilot slash field medic, to send to their recue. From one Enterprise ship that wasn't his, to another, Jim had travelled across time and space - which wasn't so unusual for him, but he was incredibly lucky, he knew that.

Jim had been put in stasis, and later, awoke here, in the Infirmary, for the first time, several days ago.

Then, Jim Kirk had to realise entirely, and wake up to the fact, that he was here, in the twenty fourth century now.

"Is there anything I can get you?" That wonderfully familiar voice asked. 

That voice's owner was one of the reasons why it was so easy for Jim to still believe he was in his own time, in his own prime, back on his Enterprise. "Spock, you're still here!" He'd said that, first, when he awoke here, that first time, and saw, joyously, that Spock was still around in this Century. (Apparently, Scotty was, too - and he now lived on Risa, where he and his new wife owned a bar!)

"I am, yes." Spock noted. "Do you wish me to go?"

"Never!" Jim said, very quickly. "I'm still happy to see you, Spock. I will forever be!" Jim grinned. "I know though, that you, being you, must still have work that requires your attention."

"I have finished with it, Jim. When Picard's message about you came through to me, I had just stood down from my work on Romulus and Remus, enabling my colleagues to carry on the work. I have now been ushered into the job of Chairperson of the Federation's Diplomatic Corps."

"I remember you telling me so; when was it that you did, two days ago?" Jim asked, trying to sit up in his bed.

Spock assisted Jim in his effort - and secured, for him, the bed's remote control unit. He sat, very carefully, at the foot of Jim's bed. "Currently, I have no work to do. I will, from now on, have much less work to do - and even if that were not the case, which it is, thanks to my new 'title', I would make sure that it was. To be here, to be anywhere, with you." He said quietly, but he looked into Jim's eyes resolutely, as he said it.

Jim bit back tears again. He knew that they both were, in their own way.

"I spoke to Deanna Troi today." Spock noted.

"The Counsellor woman?" Jim asked.

"Yes. She says she will be 'dropping by' to see you tomorrow." Spock explained.

"When will I ever be allowed out of here, Spock?" Jim queried.

"I will enquire about the subject once again." Spock replied gently.

"Starfleet tell me they have gifted me with an apartment, to welcome me 'back', as such. Do you have an apartment as well?" Jim asked of Spock.

"When leaving for the Diplomatic Mission of which we spoke earlier, I sold my apartments on Earth and Vulcan. I do still have my father's home to return to."

"Will you?" Jim questioned.

"What do you wish, Jim?" Spock asked discreetly. They were alone, in this room, but a hospital was still a public place.

"Stay at the new apartment with me..? Live with me?" Jim suggested, plainly hoped.

"Gladly, T'hy'la..." Spock promised.

**

"I do appreciate your coming to see me, Counsellor." Jim noted, as Deanna Troi had said she was about to leave, after visiting him.

Deanna gave Jim Kirk a look that openly said 'yes, well, I'm not sure I believe you... Then, again, you are James T. Kirk!' She retrieved something from her bag. "I have this," She handed him an envelope. "For you and Spock."

"For me, and Spock?" Jim asked mischievously.

"I don't mean to assume things; it's not totally obvious. I admit, I could be wrong - I haven't read more than privacy permits from either of you, I promise... It's just." She tried to find the right words.

Jim Kirk patted Deanna Troi's hand. "It's okay. I know. Don't worry about it. Can I open this now?" Jim asked permission.

"Of course." Deanna smiled.

Jim did so. "Oh, wow! Good for you!" Jim grinned. "You and Riker are getting married!"

"And, if you'd like to attend the ceremony, and/or the party afterwards, we'd be happy that you attended. It's not a traditional Betazoid wedding. No nakedness!" Deanna laughed.

"I suppose that's for the best. Spock will certainly feel more comfortable about attending!" Jim noted, in good humour. Jim looked up to the door behind Deanna, and saw his Spock standing there, as he spoke of him.

"Indeed." Spock noted, agreeing with Jim.

Deanna turned to see Spock at the door. "Hello, Ambassador." She used his old title, said it with warmth and respect.

"Thank you for the invite to yours and Commander Riker's wedding, and congratulations on deciding to get married." Spock said.

"Well, it's an absolute clich�, but recent events have been enough to make us think!" Deanna explained. 

"Yeah, that's more than understandable!" Jim noted.

"I concur." Spock said.

" The wedding will be small, and there will be absolutely no reporters, anywhere, to bother any of us." Deanna made sure she informed her rather famous friends. "Well, I should be getting back home to Will's place..." Deanna said. "I'm expecting yet another comm-call from my mother! One from the Estate Agent as well." She smiled again. "Good evening, gentlemen..." She turned and left the room.

Spock sat down on the seat beside Jim's bed, after making sure the privacy setting to his hospital room door, had been resumed/the invisible screen was now back up. It blocked out noise coming from a filtering through to, Jim's room. Only the medic alert channel was receiving and sending anything, and that had to have a thumb print keyed into it, to hear anything more than the medically necessary, from Jim, and anyone else in his room.

"Thank You for being here..." Jim told him, heartfelt.

"Thank YOU for being here." Spock held the hand that Jim had just reached out to him. "Thank you." He said again.

 

The End...? 25.6.14


	3. Moments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kirk and Spock get home from Will and Deanna’s wedding

Kirk and Spock get home from Deanna & Will's wedding... He watches Spock, walking around the house, and he waits nervously as Spock reads a letter from him.

Moments

Jim watched as Spock walked down the hallway in his white robe. He stepped out of the kitchen, and smiled at Spock. "Go sit down. I will bring us some Saurian Brandy or something. I wrote you a letter before we left for Will and Deanna's wedding. I know, I know!" He grinned at Spock's famous eyebrow expression. "Quaint old human!" He paused, placing his hands one each on Spock's arms, breathing in the scent of the bath oils Spock had used during his indulgence of a water Jacuzzi bath, which had ended just moments ago. Jim could see water droplets in Spock's hair still. "It's cosy in there, I've made sure of it. Go on!" He grinned at the man he loved so much.

Spock smiled. He only ever did that for Jim. "Yes, Captain." He said, and walked on to the 'living room', a name for a room that he had always found rather odd. One lived in every room of their home.

Jim happily watched Spock walk through to the other room, and he mouthed the words 'I love you' to him, as he watched him go. Spock couldn't see Jim do that, but Jim wondered if Spock could sense it. 'Do I have to be nervous about that possibility?' Jim considered. 'I'll find out in a minute.' He thought, and, thought completed, he went back in the kitchen to get those drinks, and let Spock read the letter.


	4. Love Letter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jim asks Spock a very important question

Author's Chapter Notes:  
This chapter has been posted already, as part of an entirely KS 3parter - but it fits this little series, and I think it adds to it...

Love Letter

When you mind melded with Picard, so that you could see what happened; how I came back into your life, you will have seen things that didn't absolutely make sense.

The woman on the horizon was not an old flame, nor was she someone I lusted after. Actually, that's not entirely true - I did lust after her in years long past. I would look at my family's photo of their old friend; the photo in a hallway at the Ranch - and think how beautiful this woman was; how beautiful she must have been - how I spent time wishing that I had been around in her time, to know her in the flesh!

Seeing her on the horizon, as I did, when this new Captain, Captain Picard, turned up, and was telling me that my surroundings were not real, it was my way of testing what he was telling me again and again, not that I didn't already know it in my heart of hearts. There was no way that she could be there, for real. Well, discounting my old dream having come true. Time travel - me being around on Earth, when she was. So, maybe, my test was off. But, if I'd seen you there, I doubt I could have left. I've wanted the life we were going to have there, for so long.

If Picard hadn't interrupted, I would have lit a fire in the bedroom hearth, kept you warm, made you comfortable, made you breakfast, and made love to you, from that moment on. That was my dream. My dream now. It still is. I knew I'd find you there, where I want you, where, it seems, I have always wanted you - though you would/you will tell me that 'always' is an exaggeration.

I am so incredibly lucky to be alive, to have survived again, and then, again, when Soran tried to kill me. I am more lucky that you are still alive; we are in this new era. Here together. 

I awoke from the stasis they put me in on the shuttlepod, to save my life. I awoke because I felt your presence again, in a way that I knew was missing, when I thought about it too much, for the short period of time that I was in the Nexus, and you were home with me. You are my home, Spock. You gently touched my hand, when I lay in that Infirmary bed. You even more gently touched my mind. You held fast to my soul, and me to yours. As ever. You so definitely touched my heart.

You have to know that I am not just asking you this for the sake of companionship and familiarity. You have to know that. I trust.

I am sorry for asking you this in a letter, not even in a mind meld. I don't mind what you do with the letter afterward. I know about Vulcans and their privacy. I have a feeling that you'd have preferred me to confess all this in a mind meld (and, I'm not entirely assuming you want me to confess it at all?). I will tell you all this, and so much more, lay myself bare to you (even at this late stage!) in a mind meld, if you wish one to take place after this letter. I just didn't trust my mind, when I thought about writing to you, to lay it all out as orderly as in this letter. It's helped me. I hope it's helped you. I hope it can bring us together. When you have finished reading this, call me back into the room.

I love you, Spock.

Will you marry me?

 

Yours forever, James Tiberius Kirk

 

The End..?  
26.5.14


	5. Affirmation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spock calls Jim in to the room

Author's Chapter Notes:  
Spock calls Jim into the room...

Affirmation

"Jim." Spock called gently.

Jim appeared, from his kitchen, carrying two drinks. "Thought we could use these?" He handed Spock one of the glasses.

"I won't tell you that 'always' is an exaggeration, not this time." Spock mentioned part of Jim's letter.

"You won't?" Jim smiled cautiously.

"Not this time." Spock promised. He placed his drink on the coffee table beside his seat. 

Jim leant forward; almost across Spock, putting down his drink, too. Beside Spock's. As he stood upright again, Jim watched as Spock reached out, and held his hands.

Spock looked into Jim's eyes. He touched Jim's right hand with the o'zhesta.

Jim's breath hitched. He looked up into Spock's eyes. The two men mirrored one another, as ever. Jim reached out his left hand, caressing Spock's left hand. Another Vulcan kiss.

Then, Spock held Jim ever closer, and sort out his lips, whispering, in those sweet moments. "I love you, Jim, and I will marry you."

The End..?  
26.5.14


	6. Chances

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spock asks Jim what it is he (Jim) craves

Spock asks Jim to talk to him about one of Jim's fantasies...

"Tell me, Jim, what more is it you crave?" Spock asked, brushing back a lock of Jim's hair from his face. "You are trying to hide something from me - I know that much." He noted, as he lay in Jim's bed with him, in San Francisco.

"Is there much left that we haven't just done?" Jim smiled.

"There's something you want. Nothing you would want would make me love you any less." Spock spoke gently.

"I know." Jim promised, touching Spock's shoulder tenderly. "That's what worries me. You'd pretty much do anything for me - whether you're really into the idea, or not."

"What I believe you are thinking about, is not something that Vulcans would not do. It is a logical course of action when it is all that can be done. What we are supposed not to do, is let our thoughts, our needs, and our control over our own autonomic functions, get so one track minded, that the only logical course of action becomes necessary." Spock explained.

"So, have you ever let those wonderful hands of yours," Jim touched them reverently, as he spoke of them. "wander over this Glorious body of yours, while thinking of me?"

"I have wanted to." Spock confessed. "Though I did not think that you could ever find yourself in love with me, so, I tried to keep my hands away from my genitalia, whenever it presented a battle for what it wanted then, and wants now, upon thinking of you..."

"Myself and my genitalia can identify with that 'problem'..." Jim confided, grinning.

"We do not have to suffer it any further." Spock kissed Jim's lips, first with his fingers, then, with his own lips.

After some beautiful moments, Jim continued his now freed trail of thought. "So, now that you know that I have found myself absolutely in love with you, Spock..."

"Would I like to fulfil a -long standing need - of mine, and a fantasy of yours, to touch myself, letting you witness me do so, while thinking of you sexually?" Spock enquired. "Do I want to fulfil your fantasy of having my cum drip hotly all over your wanton body, and feel the reactions from your body, and mine, as we meld ever deeper, in every possible way that T'hy'la can?"

"You said it!" Jim pulled Spock to him, running his hands up and down the Vulcan's spine, pinching his firm backside, and feeling his even firmer erection at the junction of their joining groins.

Spock yearned for Jim, yearned with him. "Yes." He confirmed. "Yes!"

Jim, possessed with lust and Spock's more than willing confirmation, kissed the man who had earlier this evening agreed to be his husband, so definitely and need-fully. "Your wish is my Command, Ashaya..." He told Spock.

"As yours is mine, James. As yours is so truthfully mine." Spock murmured, seconds before another of their loving fantasies began to come graspingly true.

The End..?

1.6.14


	7. Past, Present, and Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Author's Chapter Notes: Back To The TNG part of the story 
> 
> Quite a few years after the last Chapter, Will Riker goes to stay somewhere in France, with his old friend & Captain, Jean-Luc Picard... They aren't expecting what happens between n the slightest!
> 
> This story is a sequel to one I never expected to write one for - a sequel for the Deanna & Picard HC & Romance story, 'Comfort', written 8 years ago! That story wasn't, at that point, AU (exactly) - but it is NOW, because this sequel is definitely AU. It takes some ideas (the one of Jean-Luc having a form of dementia; 'Irumodic Syndrome') from the TNG finale, "All Good Things".

PAST, PRESENT, & FUTURE

"Good Lord! What are you doing here, Number One?" Jean-Luc turned back to his bed, glass of warm milk in hand.

Will Riker awoke, blearily, propped himself up on his elbow, looking worriedly at Jean-Luc Picard. He put the side light on; the table that held it, being next to him. He sat up slowly, looking at Jean-Luc the entire time. "I live here, Jean-Luc."

Jean-Luc sat down on the foot of the bed. Will Riker gently crawled across the bed, sitting carefully next to Jean-Luc.

"We're together these days, aren't we?" Jean-Luc looked to Will.

"Yes." Will nodded. "Have been for five years. It's twenty five years since we were Ex O and Captain."

"I'm sorry for the confusion." Jean-Luc told his partner.

"Don't say sorry, Jean-Luc. I'm more worried about you." Will confided. He slowly stood up, reaching behind him and snagging his pillow.

"Where are you off to?" Jean-Luc asked.

"First, I'm going to make sure that you're back in bed and comfortable, then, I'm going off to sleep in the spare room. I don't want you to have to wake up again and worry about why I'm here." Will said tenderly.

"Don't go anywhere, please." Jean-Luc reached out and clutched Will's free hand.

Will looked at him. "I don't want you to be afraid of me." Will answered cautiously.

"Oh, God, no, I'm not!" Jean-Luc looked up at Will. "I won't forget again, Will."

Will sat back on the bed, depositing the pillow back in place as he did so. "Get back into bed, Jean." He said lovingly. "It's going to be okay." He moved the duvet for the man he loved, got into bed himself, and made sure Jean-Luc was next to him, moving the duvet back over them both.

Jean-Luc huddled right next to Will Riker, and Riker put his bare arms around his Captain.

As Will lay there, on his side, his arms around Jean-Luc Picard, his own memory went back five years.

He'd been staying in Jean-Luc's home in France with him for three months. His grown up children, all in the early years of Starfleet Careers, or just about to embark upon one, had sent him there, to be with his friend, after he had retired from the Fleet, because of the death of his wife (the children's mother) Deanna Troi-Riker. She had contracted some illness that only affected Betazoids, an illness that Will still could not truly understand, or even pronounce. She had received several blood transplants from her younger half-brother, but was still gone within months.

One evening, he and Jean-Luc had drunk a little too much wine.

Jean-Luc got quiet, and then, had said; "I slept with Deanna once."

"You what?" Will remembered all but spluttering the words, putting down his latest glass on the table next to him.

"After the incident with the Borg, and the night before I went to the Vineyard in France, where my brother and his family lived." Jean-Luc tried not to recall the day he'd got news of the fire that killed them all.

"Why??" Will had fumed.

"I wanted gentleness, care." Jean-Luc noted. "Deanna..."

"She was all that." Will interjected.

"Yes. I'm sorry." Jean-Luc said truthfully.

"Why tell me now..?" Will had asked.

"Guilt." Jean-Luc had answered. "Two-fold guilt."

"I don't want to talk about your night with Deanna, my wife. Yes. I know she wasn't my wife then, but it doesn't make a difference! You knew we were still in love. I thought we were."

"You and she were, Will." Jean-Luc promised. "She as much as said so. She just wasn't sure it was ever going to work out to be what she wanted; not at that point."

Will grabbed his glass, and drank down the wine. "I let her down in that era. I know I did."

"No." Jean-Luc stated firmly. "You're not to be blamed."

Will stood up. "I'm leaving. Time I went back from the place I thought was becoming a new home, to the place that was my home, before my wife died."

Will had left, but he couldn't face going back to his and Deanna's house. He had stayed in the next French village over from the one where Jean-Luc's chateau was.

Two days later, he had found himself back at Jean-Luc's chateau, walking up to the kitchen slash front door entrance, luggage, again, in hand. He saw, in the open doorway, Jean-Luc standing on a wooden chair, looking at something - and he picked up his pace, dashing to the door. "Jean-Luc! Are you okay??"

Jean-Luc's eyes blinked, and he looked down to Will. "You're back."

"What are you doing? What were you doing?" Will was worried.

Jean-Luc stared at him. "I wasn't about to do anything stupid!" He replied.

Will stepped up, offering Jean-Luc his hand, his support.

Jean-Luc found himself taking it, and stepping down from the chair.

They held hands, standing before one another. Silently.

"I realised that I was being a hypocrite." Will suddenly said.

"How so?" Jean-Luc asked calmly.

"I slept with Beverly once. Not only was she my wife's best friend, but I know that you and she, well, there was something between you... It happened when I was host to Odan. I could use that as an excuse, but, truthfully, it wasn't as if Odan was like a tyrant, supressing me entirely. I was curious; curious about what it would be like with Beverly; curious about if and how I would experience what Odan thought and felt, and vice versa." Will explained.

"I was a very unprofessional Captain, Will - To sleep with Deanna, to be on the verge of a romantic relationship with Beverly all those years, and now, to..." Jean-Luc paused.

"To what?" Will asked, looking at how he and Jean-Luc still held hands.

"You know what." Jean-Luc looked at their hands, too. "I - I've..." He paused again, then, looked into Will's eyes. "I've fallen for you, Will."

"Really?" Will asked quietly.

"Really." Jean-Luc said. "It isn't all about loneliness either. I'm increasingly sure of that. I realise that it's not like I was in love with you, back then, but now... Now, is an entirely different matter."

"Jean-Luc, these months, here, with you, have not just been about not going back to my house; they've not just been about living with my grief over Deanna's death. As unbelievable as I know it may seem; don't take that last sentence the wrong way; I'm pretty sure I've fallen for you, too. My former Captain. Oh, the cliche of it all! And, then, there's the 'what would Deanna think?" thought floating around my head!" He looked to the kitchen's back wall briefly. Then, to Jean-Luc again, "What will my kids think, if they find out about you and I?"

"I know. I don't want to make her, or them, upset either." Jean-Luc confirmed. "And, yes. We are a cliche. There are those, like us, though. I once suffered rather a tough injury helping to make sure that Captain James T. Kirk, could come from the Nexus, into this Century... Where he was reunited with the man who was once his First Officer -Ambassador Spock, whom I've also been fortunate enough to meet- and they have, since that day when Jim became a twenty fourth century citizen, let it be known, albeit to a very few people, that they've been in love, for decades - even the decades that they were apart because of the Nexus. They are now retired, together, and married." He mentioned. "Now, I'm not saying that we should run out and marry each other, but, I am definitely, I have decided, in love with you, William T. Riker. I can't help that fact."

Will caressed Jean-Luc's hand. "We've got a lot to work out. Maybe, I should have left - but I couldn't. You were the main reason for that. Can I stay, Jean-Luc?" Will queried.

"Yes." Jean-Luc thoughtfully smiled.

The next morning, after talking for the rest of the previous day, Will carefully began a conversation, at the breakfast table. "I saw Deanna in my dreams last night."

"Not for the first time, I would have thought." There was no cheek in Picard's tone of voice.

"No." Will noted, drinking his coffee. He placed it down. "She told me she would talk to you, too."

Jean-Luc's eyes shot up, looking at Will. "I had a dream last night where I talked to Deanna, too. She actually said she'd just been speaking with you!"

Will's breath caught. "It didn't feel like a dream made of a composite of memories. I've never seen the long gown she was wearing... We were sitting out there, on the veranda, where you and I sometimes sit."

"That's where we were sat." Jean-Luc noted

They never talked about the dream they apparently shared after that first time. Yet, both men knew that each of them wondered if Deanna really had been acting as their Guardian Angel.

Around lunchtime that day that they'd talked of the dream over breakfast, the two retired men were clearing away lunch things from the same table. Their hands touched, as they each brushed a crumb absent-mindedly from the table. They were stood side by side. They held hands again.

Will made the first move from that point of hand holding. He cautiously walked to face Jean-Luc, and he kissed him. Deeply.

It didn't stop there. Jean-Luc leant on the table, as he and Will kissed, hard. "Are you sure you're not just, I don't know..." He couldn't say it.

"Getting even with Deanna, for having slept with you? Taking the chance to be in charge with the man who was once my Captain?" Will asked.

"Are you sure?" Jean-Luc asked, one of his hands warmly on Will's broad chest.

"I'm not doing it for either of those reasons, or any such reason. I love you, Captain-mine!"

That did it. Jean-Luc ravenously kissed his Number One, taking Will's hands, placing Will's hands on his Captain's groin for him. "You may as well undo me. You have already." He barely breathed.

Will undid Jean-Luc's fly.

"You can, Will. Do it. Go on." Jean-Luc urged Will to touch him there, to take him out, fondle him, hold him, have him. All of it, and more...

Will hungrily but carefully took Jean-Luc out of his confines.

They still kissed.

"I have been with a man, but not in decades, Jean. Have you?" Will asked.

"Same problem as you, Will, but we'll be okay." He laughed then, reaching for the bottle of olive oil left on the table from lunch. He handed it back to his soon to be lover.

Will laughed with him, but stepped back, and tipped some of the oil into his hands, before reaching around, and placing the bottle securely on the table.

Jean Luc turned stepped out of his trousers and underwear, kicked off his deck shoes, standing on the red kitchen tiles barefoot. He smiled at Will, "Believe it or not, I've not ever been one to sleep around either. I had a clean bill of health at my last checkup, and I've not slept with anyone, at all, since. Dry spells are a way of life at my age - one long, dry spell." He noted, and turned himself around, leaning on the table, pushing his backside at Will.

Will rubbed oil in all the right places on Jean-Luc. "We don't need condoms, on my behalf, either." He grinned.

They were both nervous, they knew it - but, oddly, it didn't feel odd to be doing what they were doing.

Soon, Will was standing so close to Jean-Luc. Jean Luc could feel Riker's hard cock on his backside. Picard's fingers clenched the edge of the table, and his body soon clenched Riker's extended form.

Riker kissed Jean-Luc's back and shoulders, clasped the man's torso hotly in his wandering hands, and then, Will's hands went lower, wandering evermore, between Jean-Luc's legs, ministering to him, making Jean-Luc, and, in turn, himself, harder and harder...

Their hips undulated, that universal locomotive rhythm; it built and built and built... Their kisses, touches, reached for, turned to grab, the slap of skin on skin, in those most pleasure-full regions... They fucked one another. They fucked together... And then, bare, hot seconds apart; they came; Jean-Luc first; his prostate had been pressed, like the button that it sort of was, again and again, and again, until he came, calling out, and gasping, turning the French air blue with sexual expletives and terms...

Will came, with an almost primal grunt, holding on to Jean-Luc all the while. Kissing Jean Luc's neck and spine over and over, and then, actually hugging him, hugging him, trying to get his breathing back to normal, (as they stood their facing the kitchen wall) he found, with all his heart. Smiling. Actually silently shedding a tear, that fell on Jean-Luc's lean back. One of happiness (for the first time in about a year)...

* * *

Will could feel himself wanting to cry. He realised he had been given two loves of his life, in all his years. Deanna, darling Deanna... Then, all these years later, against all the odds, and, in spite of everything, his dear, dear Jean, here, sleeping in his arms now, as they spooned through the warm French night. Jean-Luc who, like Deanna was, may be taken from him by illness. What was worse? Losing Deanna so very quickly, or Jean-Luc, a little more slowly? Each situation was as terrible as the other. He would be alone again -apart from the family members he still had. He cherished them, of course. His father. His sons. His daughter. His brother-in-law; he was grateful for them all. Cared awesomely much for each of them. Of course he did - But he would lose love again. He did know he was lucky to have found it, twice; he'd certainly never expected, or even, exactly, hoped for it, the second time, with Jean-Luc- but he wanted it, none-the-less - losing the man would break his heart none-the-less. He just absolutely prayed that the Specialist who was treating Jean-Luc's form of that old disease, dementia, could cure it, with the new regime of even newer medication, and procedures, designed specifically to combat (hopefully) Jean-Luc's Irumodic Syndrome; that would be starting next week... Riker had been considering contacting Beverly, who was now Head Of Starfleet Medical. He'd not seen her since Deanna's funeral. Could she help in his dearest wish, to postpone, for a very long time, Jean-Luc's? He also considered, not for the first time, since Jean-Luc's diagnosis, talking with their old friends, Geordi and Data. Data was president of the Federation's A.I and Robotics Research Facility, and Geordi La Forge, his vice-president. Could they help? Could nanobots help to keep Jean-Luc's brain alive and healthy; keep the electrical impulses in his brain working and regulating properly; stop the degradation of his neural pathways? He'd spoken with Jean-Luc, in detail, about this as a possible procedure of some kind; it had been suggested to them by one of the Doctors they'd seen. Jean-Luc was reluctant, and Will could not blame him at all; the nanobots might accidentally damage his brain, and its processing power, even more than nature's cruelty was. Will was even thinking about talking to Spock. The last time he had seen Spock and Jim Kirk, was at the memorial service and conference that some of Deanna's colleagues held for her on Betazed, for those of them who could not attend her funeral. Spock and Jim could not attend it, because they had been asked to become Godparents to their friend McCoy's great great grandson, who had been named in his memory.

Spock's family knew about Bendii Syndrome, of course, because he father suffered from it. Bendii and Irumodic Syndromes had similarities. Vulcan Healers might have ideas about how to combat Irumodic Syndrome.

Will fell asleep, holding Jean-Luc, with that fervent prayer for a cure, the cure that couldn't come for Deanna, in her illness, (admittedly, very different to her former Captain's, even though the illnesses were both contractable, individually - they were not STDs-) the cure equally desperately needed as it was for Deanna, definitely; to come for Jean-Luc, on his lips... He recalled the day that he and Jean-Luc got the diagnosis, and he was angry with himself still, ashamed, that he had asked Jean-Luc, that day, 'Did you know? Did you know, when I found you, contemplating, whatever you said you weren't contemplating, standing there on a chair in your kitchen??; There was that anger, and pain; it mingled with memories of the day Deanna told him she was ill. He had been angry then, too, but not at her - except for that she hadn't taken him with her to the Doctor's Appointments she'd obviously been to. It was all so terrible, then and now. So much sorrow. He thought, if he lost Jean-Luc, too, then, he might be standing on a chair, downstairs, in the kitchen, where he'd found Jean-Luc that afternoon, lonely, and pondering... Pondering. To overcome that urge to end it all then, to now be 'rewarded' with Irumodic Syndrome; Will worried for Jean-Luc; he had promised he would never end it all in suicide - but Will feared. He feared that Jean-Luc might, literally, forget that promise. Though, in truth, to consider suicide had been out of character for Jean-Luc five years ago. It had been a mad moment that Jean-Luc had never entirely admitted to - was the situation ever going to get that desperate again? Will vowed not. He would forever protect his Captain. That was his duty. Now, more than ever...

The End..?24.6.14/25.6.14


End file.
